Traditionally the role of the Mother Of The Bride is to be the hostess of the wedding. This includes organising the guest list, liaising with the couple as to what their desires are, sending invites as appropriate and then collating the acceptances to aid yourself and the bride to draw up the table plan for the reception.
Organising the flowers and gift list are also traditionally down to the bride’s Mother. However, you will find that your role will change according to the nature of the wedding and the involvement of the bride, groom and other family and friends. As the hostess of the day, you will need to ensure that all is finalised for the reception – such as caterers, balloon artists and florists all have adequate access to the venue to prepare. On the big day, you will be needed by your daughter to be a soothing influence, calming any jitters and ensuring that she is ready on time. You will travel to the ceremony with the bridesmaids, while the bride’s Father travels with the bride.Most of all, smile, enjoy the day, and don’t forget to pack your hankies! You have a quiet life! Traditionally, you don’t need to get involved in planning the day (other than paying for a lot of it!) Mind you, with so much to do, I am certain that your daughter, wife and even future son-in-law, would appreciate your input and assistance! One of your ‘traditional duties’ is, unfortunately to foot the bill for some items – see our section on ‘Who Pays?’ for more information.You will be the last person to spend time alone with the bride, in the car on the way to the ceremony, so use this time to pacify any last minute tension and remind your daughter of how beautiful she looks and how proud you are of her. Your main role is to give your daughter away to her husband, walking her down the aisle on her left hand side, and passing her hands into that of her beloved. You will need to make the first speech at the Reception, so ensure that you have fully prepared, and have not had too many glasses of champagne. From there your duties are fulfilled, so enjoy the rest of the day! Traditionally, the Groom’s parents don’t get involved with the planning, other than advising their son on his decisions, as and when appropriate. Pending on the closeness of the relationship you have with the family of your future daughter-in-law, do ask them if they would like some help of any sort with the planning of the wedding. Do ensure that Mother of the Groom doesn’t wear an outfit which clashes with that of the Mother of the Bride! Why not take the opportunity to bond prior to the big day and shop for outfits together? With the amount on offer online, you need not leave the comfort of your own home. If they do, then enjoy taking part in the planning, but if they are happy organising it themselves, don’t take it personally, sit back, relax and then revel in the joys of a stress free big day!
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