Honesty is the best policy when it comes to this common wedding dilemma.
If you are not inviting any children, make it clear to your guests. If you are just inviting certain children, warn parents of other children before the wedding day and explain why; otherwise when they see other children there they will feel bad that they should have brought their’s, or they will wonder why their’s weren’t invited.
If your relatives don’t get on, speak to them. Explain that it is your day, and they need to put their differences aside for that one day. Be sensitive; don’t put them on the same table to force them to get on!
Whether to invite children to your wedding is an emotive and therefore important decision to make from the outset. Since many venues do not make a distinction between children and adults in terms of numbers it is a decision that needs to be made fairly early on. For some people children are an essential ingredient for their wedding but for others the thought of having children running around the reception is hell. If you do decide to invite children it may be worth putting them at the back of the church and organizing a children’s entertainer for the speeches later in the evening. If children are not on your guest list, are are not included in the invitation, then you may get friends ringing up to confirm whether they are invited or not. Therefore it is best to have something prepared in response so you are not left in a difficult situation at the other end of the phone.
Inviting partners to wedding is one way of rapidly expanding the guest list. In some cases you may be close to their partner as well as your friend, especially if they have been together a long time. Do not feel however, that you need to invite plus ones to friends who are single. At the end of the day, it is your wedding and you can invite whoever you want.
Inviting difficult relatives to weddings can be a minefield. If you have tension in your family, perhaps between your parents and step parents, or between brothers and sisters that have not spoken in years, it is still courteous to invite them all, rather than just assuming that they won’t want to come. They are there to celebrate your wedding and therefore hopefully they can put disagreement behind them so they can have a good time with you at your wedding.
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