He Never Leaves The Seat Up

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Looking for a funny wedding reading? We love the anonymous poem He Never Leaves The Seat Up…

“He never leaves the seat up
Or wet towels upon the floor
The toothpaste has the lid on
And he always shuts the door!

She’s very clean and tidy
Though she may sometimes delude
Leave your things out at your peril
In a second they’ll have moved!

He’s a very active person
As are all his next of kin
Whereas she likes lazy days
He’ll still drag her to the gym!

He romances her and dines her
Home cooked dinners and the like
He even knows her favourite food
And spoils her day and night!

She’s thoughtful when he looks at her
A smile upon his face
Will he look that good in 50 years
When his dentures aren’t in place?!

He says he loves her figure
And her mental prowess too
But when gravity takes her over
Will she charm with her IQ?

She says she loves his kindness
And his patience is a must
And of course she thinks he’s handsome
Which in her eyes is a plus!

They’re both not wholly perfect
But who are we to judge
He can be pig-headed
Whereas she won’t even budge!

All that said and done
They love the time they spent together
And I hope as I’m sure you do
That this fine day will last forever.

He’ll be more than just her husband
He’ll also be her friend
And she’ll be more than just his wife
She’ll be his soul mate ‘till the end.”